Thoughts on parenting

I am always so worried about raising good strong kids. I constantly worry that choosing to do Oral Surgery (dad not home much, dad that is only at church half the time & doesn't have a calling, mom that is tired and burnt out 99% of the time, attending a school that has failed the state tests for the past 4 years, etc.) will have long lasting, and damaging, effects on them.

Lately I have felt so overwhelmed. There is just too much for me to do. I can't do it all! And the people & things that are most important-my children! sometimes take the brunt end of it. So I am making a conscience effort to give them each at least 15 min of one on one time everyday. I just want them to know that I love them! That I'm proud of them and that I really do like to spend time with them but there isn't anybody else here to help me with all the things that need done. This last month's visiting teaching message had a quote from Sister Beck that said something like "it has never been more important to raise a good strong home/family then it is now" and I really do feel that. Everywhere we look Satan has brought his evil into the "norm" and it doesn't even phase people. Standards are slipping, expectations lowered, and it makes me sad. I just pray that even though I'm only one small person that Heavenly Father can help me make ends meet with teaching & raising the kids right. There really do need to be 2 sets of hand but Ben's just aren't available right now.

I was working on some other church stuff online when I found something someone had written about blessings. It was jsut from the bible dictionary on page 753 and it said something like "there needs to be effort on our part to receive blessings. We need to put some energy & thought into how to make them most of them" It is general conference this weekend so it was being used to talk about the different ways you can increase your effort in gaining blessings from GC but I have been thinking a lot about that with my struggles of feeling like I'm not up to the task I"ve been given for these few years. I am so so so tired and burnt out everynight. I go not stop for about 17 hours every day doing things for other people and in the end it just isn't enough or isn't a good enough job. So as I go into the GC weekend I hope to find some answers to how to make sure I'm doing the best I can with the kiddos. I want them to be smart, strong, independant, faithful men. Not one of the mormons I seems to see alot..."mormons" with liberal views on things. Mormons who hangout in bars, wear immodest clothes, support gay marriage, etc. That is my hope and prayer right now as a mother of 3 wonderful boys who are growing up in a scary world!

The Bran MAN

Colin was able to go to a Cubs game with Ben the other night. He has waited patiently for about a year for one of Ben's bosses to give them tickets so he was SO excited when it finally happened. They got all ready and headed out for their Father/Son night. They both had a lot of fun and Colin wore his Cubs sticker for about 3 days afterward...he just kept switching it to his new clothes.

Anway, while they were gone Evrett, Brannon and I got to hangout. We were playing games, then they played Wii while I read. It was a nice night, but Brannon said the funniest thing. He came up to me all nervous. I could tell he wanted to tell me something but he was either afraid or embarrassed to do it. I asked him what it was and he said:

"Well, at recess everyday we have races."

he swallows and rubs his eyes (this is difficult for him!)

"and this GIRL always wins every time! None of the boys can catch her except for Timmy (little black boy) but only when we play tag. She still wins all the races"

He was so distraught over this I had to try really hard not to laugh at the cute kid. I explained that its normal for girls to be faster then boys until they get a little older. I told him when I was in elementary school I was the fastest rope climber in P.E. :)

Then the next day I heard him telling Ben about it too! Ben asked if she was really tall and Brannon quickly said

"NO! She just has these really long skinny legs that move really fast"

So cute I just wanted to squeeze him.


So he has been in full day school for about a month. It is going well. He is a bit behind in reading and math from where Colin was at this stage b/c of the difference in kindergartens they went to. But he works hard and so far has been on the best "green" level everyday. He really likes his teacher and has made some new friends. He is just really tired (and therefore very grumpy) after school. But we love him anyway :)



Colin is doing really well in school so far too. His teacher is very organized and sends home great homework that he actually likes doing. He has gotten 100% on all his spelling tests and is learning to love reading. He has been on Green everyday too, except for one day b/c for some weird reason. He is slowly making new friends. One boy we found out lives on our street, so hopefully we can play with him some more. They parents are all just a little distant to me b/c I'm white I guess. He is just a great older brother and helps me out a lot. He isn't super organized and uptight with his things/backpack/homework but he is very responsible when it comes to asking him to do things.

I just need to take more pictures of them! They don't like to let me so I've quit trying I guess.

Primary Calling

I was called to be the primary first counselor. It took about 8 weeks to get "set apart" because Ben wasn't at church any of the sundays (to watch our wild children :) the bishopric had time to do it. So I served in the calling for 8 weeks without that blessing and I have strongly felt the difference since receiving it. It was a really detailed blessing and I'm sad I lost the notes I wrote down immediately afterwards but the things I remember are:

* to love the kids. some come from not ideal home environments and they need to feel our love.
*VISIT the kids! in their homes. It will help both them and us as leaders
* that I'd be able to discern what is right/appropriate for primary and what is not AND that I would have the courage to stand up and express boldly my opinions. (I have since had such a clear mind on what I think should and should not be done. There is no need for extra analyzing it. and I don't feel bad saying so ...in a nice way :)
* that I'd be able to organize and help the axillary go smoothly
* that Heavenly Father was pleased with my energy and excitement for Primary

I have been so busy with this calling. The pres is a full time teacher, a masters degree night student, a wife, and a mother to 2 kids so I need to be able to help her pick up her slack from her life. The other counselor's family suddenly decided to move so hasn't been much help to us. A lot has fallen on me and despite being a little stressed and having some mild anxiety, everything that needs to get done is done. I'm not always sure how. I know I am getting a lot of help from up above. Things have just been falling into place. I am so grateful for a loving and caring heavenly father that is so watchful of all our needs, both big and small.

Here we are at a baptism for Lily Morales. Andra Staley ,in the pink shirt, used to be her primary teacher. Sarah Hoagland, in the white, was the primary second counselor-but she moved. Ross Quijano is the fun guy in the middle of all the kids.

Evrett starts "School" and other cute randomness

Evrett started school! Well...kind of :) We are doing a preschool swap with 4 other moms/kids. We each take a turn teaching for a week (two days per week). So far he has really liked it and hasn't cried when I leave him. The poor kid doesn't know how to play with kids his age so it should be good for him. Although he still has way more fun with his brothers. He really wanted to wear his backpack...which I filled with his diapers and wipes and was a good reminder to me that he still is my little guy who needs diapers :) Otherwise I was getting really sad over how fast they grow up.
We have planned a few "field trips" for the preschool. Our first one was to an apple orchard in Indiana. We invited any playgroup people to come along too. It was so much fun. The apples were delicious and perfect kid sizes.

Evrett LOVES food. He is always hungry. He smells food wherever we go (like neighbor bbqs, restaurants near the Target parking lot, etc.) and sniffs & sniffs then always says "Mmmm, that smells GOOD." Sometimes he adds in what he thinks it is... "Mmmm that chicken smells GOOD." (Bbq) He is so cute.

My mom got him some play food for christmas that he loves. He gets all the pots and pans out and makes us yummy things. He also loves to help me cook.



We are doing pretty good with the big boys gone all day at school. He has school a coupel days a week and then I try to play games with him or take him to the park the other days. One day we went to the "Duck Park" with just 2 pieces of bread (they hadn't ever been very hungry before) but we had about 100 ducks come flying at us to eat! So the next day we came back with a huge $1 walmart loaf of bread for the. We had a blast. He really likes running errands and playing outside. He asked to watch TV once (the Wiggles) but he didn't watch for long. He likes to build trains and play playdough while I run on the treadmill. He has definitely gotten stubborn and likes things certain ways. He gets REALLY frustrated when he wants something but I can't understand what he is saying. But overall he is a wonderful little guy to have around!


He loves to climb things, although he still doesn't try climbing out of his crib.


He was in charge of the boys' basketballs during their practice.


This is when he was so sick with a cold (he still get asthma when sick) and he wanted SO BAD to get up to play but would last about a minute and I'd find him laying down, too tired to play. I found him in mulitple rooms of the house like this and once even face down on the pantry floor. Poor kid!
When we go to Grandpa & Grandma's he always wants "BUM BUM SQARE PANTS" on...Sponge bob square pants :) He will watch it for a little while but he will always tell you it is his favorite. We went to a lego store and he found a Lego Mr. Crabs (from the show) so we had to take a pic.


And Evrett was invited to his first b-day party without his brothers! It was a really cute fireman themed party for a boy at church, Peyton Edmunds. They had a lot of fun.

August was a rough month.

Go Jess!!

Hartmann, Batavia volleyball sweep Wheaton Academy for 6th win of season

By KEVIN DRULEY - kdruley@shawmedia.com

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Batavia's Mary Nilles sets the ball during their win over Wheaton Academy Wednesday at Batavia. (Photo by Sandy Bressner - sbressner@kcchronicle.com)

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BATAVIA – Demanding a deficit amounts to sports silliness, but maybe Batavia volleyball players should embrace a slump or two.
Sophomore outside hitter Jess Hartmann thrives on them, coming alive when it looks like the Bulldogs need a jolt.
“The strength of my game is that I get really determined,” Hartmann says. “After we start losing even more, I just want to put the ball down on the court.”
On second thought, why not simply tell Hartmann the Bulldogs are trailing? Could be a lot safer.
Batavia encountered little adversity against Wheaton Academy in Wednesday’s 25-8, 25-20 non-conference sweep, as an even-keeled Hartmann still managed a team-best five kills.
Junior Kristen Koncelik followed with four, watching as the Warriors (1-1) succumbed to a slow start that was rooted off the court.
Batavia (6-2) opened a match with a one-point edge for the second time in four days. On Saturday, a Plainfield North tournament opponent turned in an incorrect lineup. On Wednesday, a Warriors player brought the wrong uniform and had to use a jersey that did not match the listing on the roster.
Wheaton Academy seized an 11-9 lead midway through Game 2 only when junior outside hitter Bianca Cifaldi used the Hartmann syndrome to key a surge.
“I didn’t think I had so much frustration in me, but I wanted my team to do well because I know what we’re capable of,” said Cifaldi, who smacked a match-high nine kills. “I wanted them to show it, because the first game was not how we play.”
The Bulldogs felt comfortable with their own performance after ironing out a handful of focal points from this week’s practices.
Coach Lori Trippi-Payne stressed more focus on the service line, so Meghan Fabian (Game 1) and Mary Nilles (Game 2) captained separate lengthy runs to take control.
Trippi-Payne continued exploring the art of balanced hitting, so the front line – namely Hartmann – incorporated off-speed strikes when they faced the Warriors’ block.
“Jess is starting to really develop into the hitter that we always knew she could be. She’s learning how to find the holes and make some shots,” Trippi-Payne said. “We’re teaching our kids how to make shots, because they tend to still get blocked quite a bit. We’re trying to alleviate that.”
Nilles collected four digs and 12 assists while distributing the ball evenly to the Bulldogs’ attack.
Batavia’s rotation includes underclassmen Hartmann and classmate Heather Meyer, which surely served noticed to the youngsters in attendance on Rotolo Middle School Night. It wasn’t too long ago when Hartmann aspired to the high school scene.
“I looked up to the varsity players like no other,” she said, “so it just feels great to be here right now.”
She stayed no longer than two games against the Warriors after the Bulldogs’ recovery from a late charge.
Wheaton Academy rallied from a 21-12 hole to within 22-20 but would come no closer. A would-be Cifaldi kill sailed just out of bounds to end the match.
“We’ve been in tough situations before,” Fabian said, “so we knew to stay positive and keep fighting.”
For one Bulldog, anyway, that’s the preferred MO.